Couples generally come to relationship counselling when they realise their relationship is in some kind of difficulty.
Sometimes the problem is significant and has been left unattended for so long that heavily engrained patterns have surfaced and that their relationship now finds itself in crisis.
Sometimes it maybe that a couple are aware that there are difficulties which neither know how to resolve, and before it hits the critical point of no return they may choose to come for couples counselling to help resolve the issues.
Most relationships will undoubtedly hit roadblocks in their life time, as the relationship goes through different stages.
What problems might a couple talk about when they come for
When resentments and or anger erodes the love you once had for each other. Which prevents the deep connection, for intimacy, closeness, or affection in the couple relationship. These ruptures may cause disconnection making it difficult, for healing the build-up of resentments between the couple.
There may be feelings of discontentment, feeling unfulfilled, unsatisfied. These strong feelings may bring about reactive behaviours, defensiveness, that push partners further away from each other. When what each partner is seeking from the other is a sense of belonging, to feel united as a couple and safe in the arms of a loving and supportive partner.
The couple both outwardly complain or inwardly isolate their feelings of being rejected, feeling abandoned, which further causes isolation, loneliness and the belief that he or she is unloved and or unlovable.
The Couple might then engage in a vicious cycle of put downs, name calling, hurtful remarks, using harsh start-ups which only serve to see other as enemies instead of allies.
Relationship Counselling focusses on the dynamics in your relationship, It may be that behaviours learned from earlier significant carers, old patterns are possibly being re-created in the present relationship.
By taking a closer look as we understand the significance of your family of origin, explore immediate concerns, and have a new hope for the near future.
The Relationship Counsellor
Will invite you to :
Identify Triggers (Raw Spots)
Recognise Unhelpful patterns
Learn about yourself and each other
Accept differences and that change is each partners responsibility
Express feelings assertively and respectfully
Healing Emotional Wounds through Compassion and Forgiveness
Nicola will create an emotionally safe, non-judgemental environment for you as a couple to help you navigate as you express difficult feelings and emotions. To enrich and repair your intimacy, through emotional connection and more togetherness, as you both embrace being nurtured and nourished as part of your healing and personal growth.
Your relationship discovers the love you first shared and is healed through your courage to be vulnerable and transparent as you both grow together as unique individuals and also as a couple.