Many couples come to see me about intimacy issues.
Stressors of daily life
The lack of sex since having children
Pressure of work
Health issues
Mismatched body clocks
Sexual desires may change what once turned up the heat, now leaves you feeling cold
Substance abuse
Medications
Depression
Other psychological factors
Women may feel that they no longer feel sexually attractive since having children and they feel uncomfortable when their partner wants to be all amorous but emotionally she's already shut down.
Sex may become another routine where you can predict the whole performance and then becomes boring.
Affection is given in many ways from holding hands, kissing, spooning in bed, cuddling, stroking each other.
Really connecting through Emotional connections that is more than talking but truly hearing him or her.
Knowing their desires listen to the cues
What's missing?
Spice up your love act
Get the pillow talk happening
Introduce date nights & themes
The sex unhappy couple need to commit to creating time for intimacy with each other.
To be real, raw and honest with your partner be vulnerable in expressing your feelings about the lack of sex.
Acts of service
Find out yours ?
Or you're love languages?
Hormone Alert
Sometimes it's our hormones that are PLAYING havoc with our sassy sexiness or lack of sex.
Ladies get those hormones checked out, to ensure it's not other health issues affecting your libido.
GIVING YOURSELF PERMISSION TO CHANGE THE WAY YOU LOVE.
Building your relationships takes care and time to prioritize each other.
Plan date nights and book it in your diary
It's a Beautiful Thing to do...
I've known myself to be guilty if doing this and other couples who place fussing over and loving their pets first when they walk in through the door and giving away all hugs and kisses to our fur babies and ignoring our partners.
Even sitting or laying down on the sofa with your fur babies in between you.
Whose getting all the love and attention?
Also the same with children ...It really is a MINDFULNESS balancing act!
Pay Attention PEEPS When we notice our partners are waiting for some scraps to be thrown their way... It's SoTrue !!!
Teaching Point
Intimacy is more than just sex -
It's a beautiful blended mix of sharing your thoughts, your body, Emotional Energy, sexual intimacy and physical intimacy.
Showing up - Being present with each other.
NO PHONES put it away, in fact turn it Off.
Before your the one whose not only turned off, but is a complete turn off.
Celebrate each other's achievements.
Make compliments an important part of your love language.
Most of all have fun - let go of Attachment to the Outcome
Revealing what you need and want from each other, get vulnerable in expressing what you like.
Be curious about him/her
Look forward to interesting new things to discover between you.
Value yourselves more.
When we value ourselves we live a life of "Abundance"
Finding the balance between value, funful play, power, and abundance are interrelated '
Well I believe that they are interconnected".
Intimacy is more than sex in the bedroom.
It's self care, keeping our sense of personal value and power at good healthy levels.
Remember that we are all uniquely different .
So! Respect Your Differences.
Finding more ways to be emotionally close, by staying connected through your partners eyes.
Notice what are they seeing ?
What are you seeing ?
Is it realistic?
Get cooking up some spicy & sweet saucy recipes in your RELATIONSHIP.
Make Love Happy
Blissful Blessings Nicola x
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